| nostalgia | for nikki's contacts |
When Nikki was born, I had so many people tell me how much I need to cherish every moment because it goes so fast. "Watch out, they grow up too fast, you won't even notice." I got so sick of hearing it. Of course, I'm gonna cherish every moment ... of course, I'm gonna treasure it. I was on the defensive. And I hated it. Maybe because I was afraid that it would go by way too fast ... too fast for me to catch up.I wish Nikki could stay as a 4 month for a year or two. Does that even make sense to you? Basta, I want it to slow down ... just a little bit. It is hard to explain but there are days that I feel just that ... wanting to stop the clock at a moments notice. When I hear her giggle while playing with her dad ... when I see her smile while she sits on her highchair ... when she babbles away playing while I cook dinner ... when she stares at me while I'm nursing her. My baby girl is growing up ... fast ... whizzing past me. There are nights, while watching her sleep beside me, that I sometimes just wanna lift her up, hold her in my arms so that I can have more time with her in that very moment.
Right now she is just so perfect. Every morning I wake up to her morning babble ... and she looks up at me and gives me this heart-warming gummy smile. She then kicks up both legs as high as they would go and I swear I see a twinkle in those pretty eyes. Same thing happens when she naps on her swing or on the love seat ... I go to her when she wakes up from nap ... and there she is, that gummy smile and those mighty kicks and those eyes. No matter what kind of day I'm having, what mood I'm in or whether I'm sick or not .. she just lights up my world.
My baby's growing at a faster pace. My little spike haired, chubby cheeked, twinkle eyed, little babbler. No mother could have felt like this, no baby could have been so right for me, for our little family and no other stage could have been as perfect as the one we are going through at this moment. Could this be what it means to be a mother? I think I finally get it .... and tomorrow will be another day. Even more perfect than today.
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theresehabana wrote on Jan 14, '07
yen, parehas namo ug hinapay hahaha! bitaw, you want to keep them babies forever but there are still so many things to look forward to when they get a little bit bigger. so much fun, riot, and laughter. and the babbles sounds a lot funnier. and again, i say "cherish every single moment!"
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babysteps said
 No mother could have felt like this, no baby could have been so right for me, for our little family and no other stage could have been as perfect as the one we are going through at this moment. Could this be what it means to be a mother? I think I finally get it .... and tomorrow will be another day. Even more perfect than today. 
i feel so much love, so much happiness and so much wonder in your entry, yen :) thank you so much for the openness and for defining to us what motherhood is to you... in your eyes, i finally get it... and you are so right, tomorrow will even be more perfect than today :)
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